How To Set Life Strategic Goals: To Become, Be, or Do?
The purpose of life isn't happiness: it’s usefulness
I dedicate this pre-New Year edition of the Strategic Seeing newsletter to the art of thinking strategically in life.
Guess the industry by the numbers:
Valued at $11.6 billion in 2019
Books on the topic account for 5.7% of the total book market, ebooks—for 15%
30% of Americans have purchased such a book in the past year
The two most popular books—40 and 30 million copies sold
I bet you’ve already guessed – this is the self-help industry.
An army of life coaches earns a whopping $2.85 billion yearly. Millions read books, listen to podcasts, and set life goals.
However, no reliable evidence indicates that any of it works.
Neither The World Happiness Report, nor our subjective observation show that humanity is becoming much happier.
You may practice mindfulness or visualize your goals all you want, but then you still get laid off, and the rent doesn’t pay itself.
It takes a thesis to figure out why most self-help spells don’t work. A big part lies in how those gurus recommend setting life goals. And I’ve got a better idea.
Eastern Practices in the Service of Western Psychology
Cambridge Dictionary named “manifest” its word of the year.
‘To manifest’ means “to use methods such as visualization (picturing something in your mind) and affirmation (repeating positive phrases) to help you imagine achieving someting you want, in the belief that doing so will make it more likely to happen.”
In 2024, more than 130,000 users have searched for it on the dictionary's website. On TikTok, the hashtag #manifesting has 1.6 million posts, and #manifestation has 6.5 million.
Millions are racking their brains to visualize their goals as vividly as possible. As usual, there’s zero scientific proof it works, but hey, since when has that ever stopped anyone?
‘Manifestation’ as a practice sparks three concerns:
1. Many authors claim that successful people visualize their goals. But this is a correlation, not causation. Maybe they are successful because of a specific mindset, and setting goals this way simply feels natural for them.
2. Scientists have proven that the more vivid our goal visualizations, the less likely we'll achieve it. We'll dive deeper into the topic next time. Find out when and where at the end of this article.
3. Other scientists have proven that focusing on the process is more effective than on the goals. I delve into the details of strategic goal setting in Chapter 6 of my book.
Manifestation is yet another attempt to apply an Eastern spiritual practice to a Western individualistic mindset. We set me-goals and craft me-strategies.
Imitating celebrities will only make you an imitator of celebrities. If you focus on creating value for others, you can achieve more.
Followers make a leader. Fans make a celebrity. Loved ones make a person
"The individual feels the meaning and purpose of their own life only when they realize that they are needed by others." – Stefan Zweig
Most life goals are about what we want to BECOME.
You may want to become a successful entrepreneur, a famous writer, or an actor.
Often, this goal is tied to a numerical indicator: money, readers, or likes.
Such a goal is an imaginary point in the future, a very brief moment when the actual numbers align with the planned ones.
But while life consists of moments, it's also a flow. Exciting emotional peaks may brighten it, but true happiness lies in feeling content every day.
Even if you win a Nobel Prize, the phenomenon known as hedonic adaptation will quickly dull your excitement about it within just a few weeks.
Isn’t it better to BE a successful startup founder, a famous blogger, or a prominent lawyer? What if you woke up every morning and said to yourself: “Wow, I am a celebrity!”
I’m not a celebrity, but the famous people I know have told me it never happens that way. Your mornings look the same as those of ordinary people – headache, laziness, and the urge to crawl under the blanket and stay there the whole day.
What makes being a successful CEO or a legendary journalist so special? Money? Fame? Professional awards?
DOING what you love to do makes it so exciting.
If you have the luxury to spend a big part of your days doing what you love, you’re lucky.
But even solitary creative work brings no pleasure if no one needs it. Being an unrecognized genius might sound poetic, but it's hardly a happy experience.
A Chinese saying goes:
“If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day, go fishing.
If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.”
Scientific research shows that giving is a path to personal growth and happiness. Giving activates the same parts of the brain as food and sex.
Altruism is hardwired in the brain—and it's pleasurable. So, the best strategic goals of our life are not about us.
They should answer these questions:
1. What value I’d like to create, and for whom?
2. Why is creating this value important to me?
3. What reward would I like to get in return?
For instance, my personal goal is to create more value for my readers, subscribers, students, and clients through great strategic insights.
This goal may seem unmeasurable, but I don’t care.
When I achieve it, I’ll recognize it.
I am launching a new free newsletter, Life Strategy. Every Friday, you'll get a brief, bite-sized post insight about strategic thinking for life. One week, one idea: simple, concise, practical.
You can subscribe here.
In the first post, I’ll tell you why the more vivid our goal visualization is, the less likely we'll achieve it. See you there.
Business strategy, brief notes:
A few more things:
Would you like to look into the future of your industry? Read more here.
You may like my second newsletter, Strategy in Three Minutes.
Read also: Where Strategy Isn’t Born, Collaboration Dies
Check out my new book, Red and Yellow Strategies: Flip Your Strategic Thinking and Overcome Short-termism, here.
The thing about manifesting is that it can keep you stuck in dreamland if you’re not careful. At the end of the day, it’s about showing up and doing the work. You can visualize all you want, but if you don’t actually put in the effort, nothing’s going to change.
I once watched an interview with Oprah where she talked about how great she is at manifesting and making things come to her. And I couldn’t help but think—of course, she’s Oprah! She’s a billionaire; all she has to do is mention something, and people will make it happen for her. It’s not exactly the same reality the rest of us are living in.
This post is so insightful, nuanced, and inspiring for aspiring creators and leaders. Every line deeply resonated with me as it reflects strategic wisdom. Based on my years of community leadership, I fully agree that "If you focus on creating value for others, you can achieve more." Thank you for sharing your knowledge, expertise, experience, and insights so generously and clearly.